Turbo Encabulator
(Work In The Church)
Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds. James 2:18
The Basic Bible Truth
God does not need more spectators in the church. He needs Christians who are willing to get their hands dirty and do the work required for the task at hand. It is far too easy to sit back and let others do the heavy lifting, but the truth is that there is great joy and fulfillment for the Christian who is willing to put their shoulder to the plow.
The Object
A Turbo Encabulator
(Work In The Church)
Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds. James 2:18
The Basic Bible Truth
God does not need more spectators in the church. He needs Christians who are willing to get their hands dirty and do the work required for the task at hand. It is far too easy to sit back and let others do the heavy lifting, but the truth is that there is great joy and fulfillment for the Christian who is willing to put their shoulder to the plow.
The Object
A Turbo Encabulator
The truth is, this is a mythical machine that is actually not a machine at all. It does absolutely nothing, but looks very impressive. I built mine from old junk I found laying around my shop, added some copper tubing, a few fittings, an electrical cord and a switch, and I was ready to go. I usually present this in a news conference format, thanking everyone for coming, giving my pitch, and then taking questions from the audience, looking for someone to ask, “But what does it do?”
The Lesson
Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to thank you for coming to my news conference today. It is indeed an honor to stand before you today and introduce to the world, my newest invention. I have with me a prototype of what I believe may be the most incredible machine ever built. I call it “The Turbo Encabulator”.
For many years now, I have been working to bring to perfection the crudely conceived idea of a machine that would function as an inverse reactive protoboloid.
Such a machine is the Turbo-Encabulator.
Throughout development, I felt that it should automatically synchronize unitary phase components. This was realized with the medial use of capacitive directance.
The basic premise focuses on the fact that magneto flux issues must be controlled by sublunary conductors.
As you can see, the base plate is made of prefabulated amulite and surmounted by a logarithmic casing. This insures that the double spur magnetrons are in perfect alignment with the malleable flux line. The main windamere is of the normal Lotus-O-Delta type, which has effectively eliminated side cropping of the waneshaft.
You will notice 6 hydro-coptic marzelvanes attached to stator slots, each with a nonreversible tremie pipe connecting them to a differential girdlespring which is held in the “up” position by nofer trunnions.
Grouting brushes monitor the slip-stream remnants and inject a high S-value rotor resin as necessary. This process is equalized by an ingenious hopper dadoscope confirmated in each slot.
Electrical engineers will appreciate the difficulty in nubing together a regurging purwell and a standard wennelsprock. Indeed, this proved to be a stumbling block until I discovered in 2008 that the use of anhydrous nangling pins anabled the boiling shim to be tankered with very little effort.
Spiral decommutation was a second significant hurdle. The gremlin studs created insufficient gram protection. When I discovered that with the simple addition of a nivel-sheave, the wending problem was completed displaced, and perfect running was secured.
Operating points are maintained as close as possible to the normal h.f.rem peak of 12,000 pti, and once the phase detractors have been remised, no dramcock oil is required. Sinusoidal depleneration is then controlled by the reciprocating dingle arm.
Undoubtedly, the Turbo-Encabulator is the most advanced on the market today.
I would like to demonstrate this magnificent piece of engineering for you. I will plug this into normal 120 volt electrical current, and when I press the “On” button, the machine will almost instantaneously reach its equilibrium point and from that point on it will run essentially vibration free and with absolutely no sound at all. There…no perceivable vibration and completely noise free.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, The Turbo Encabulator. Thank you very much.
I will now take a few questions from the press.
What does it do? Well, no one has ever asked me that question before. Are you sure that is the question you wanted to ask? Ok, I…I am looking back through my notes here, you’ll have to excuse me just a moment…I’m pretty sure…no, that ‘s not it…hydrocoptic marzelvanes…spiral decommutation…h.f.rem peak…no…I’m afraid I have some bad news to report to you. I’m a bit embarrassed to admit this, but I believe that I have invented a machine that does absolutely nothing. Nothing at all. But at least it looks impressive doing nothing, doesn’t it?
There are a number of reasons that we should attend and be a part of a local church. First and foremost, God said so. That stands alone as reason enough. End of discussion. Let’s get in the car and go home.
If you need more than that, you may have a spiritual problem that needs to be addressed. But there are advantages for the Christian who does attend church and does not just sit as a spectator, but gets involved. The key here is involvement. At the moment of our conversion, God gives each of us a spiritual gift. That gift is given with a goal in mind. We are to use that gift in the church, in cooperation with other people who also have their individual gifts, and work together to accomplish great things for God. He uses the picture in the New Testament of a human body. Many parts working together to move and breath and live. The church likewise is many parts, each unique, but necessary for proper function.
Consider the concept of playing baseball. It’s difficult to swing a bat with only one arm. With only one eye, depth perception fails and it becomes impossible to judge the distance and speed of the pitch. Only one leg makes the running of the bases a huge challenge. We need all of our parts to play a good game. The church needs all of her parts as well, and God has strategically placed people in the church for specific purposes. We need to learn what our specific gift is, develop it, and then use it for His kingdom.
The local church fills other needs in our lives as well. We were created as social beings. We need relationships to function well. Sitting in a fishing boat on Sunday morning and watching the sunrise may make us feel close to God for a moment, but there is little to no social interaction there, and whether we want to admit it or not, God created us with a need that only the presence of other people can fill in our lives. We have all seen, or at least heard, of examples of the odd behaviors established by those who completely withdraw from society and social interaction. I recall, as a young man, hearing and reading about the richest man in the world at the time, Howard Hughes. A man with everything at his fingertips, and an amazing intellect, withdrew from everyone and lived as a very wealthy recluse. And died a very miserable, lonely man. He finished his life poorly. We need others—Christian others—who can challenge us and correct us if necessary.
We need a reminder from time to time who God is and our place in His plan. The world we live in is going to try to get our attention away from things spiritual and fill that void with anything that it can. We can easily get caught up in the lights and glitter of the excitement of the world. Satan is the greatest showman who ever lived and can quite easily distract us from what is really important in life. We need to focus on God and what He has to offer. When our children were young, we enrolled them in team sports in the community. Specifically, soccer. Our oldest, our son, played from the time he was 4 or 5 years old through high school. If you have ever been around a community league team, as the age bracket rises, so does the possibility of having to travel to neighboring towns to play games. When he started playing years ago, it was unthinkable for a league team to play a game on a Sunday afternoon. But very gradually, something changed. First, it was a “make-up game” that was scheduled “just once” on a Sunday afternoon. A year or two later, a game or two was scheduled for a Sunday afternoon. I vividly remember the weekend we found ourselves at a tournament that scheduled the final game for the top two teams for Sunday morning at 11:00. Our son chose to not play in that game and risked losing his place on the team, rather than compromise his convictions. Today, I teach a 6th-7th grade Sunday School class, and it is not uncommon during the sports seasons, to have half of the class out due to scheduled tournament games. God has described Himself as a still, small voice, a whisper. In the noise of today, that whisper is sometimes difficult to hear. Church gives us an organized, purposed time to reflect on God and his goodness. We need that structure.
Growth for the Christian occurs in many ways. Daily devotions are a wonderful thing. Listening to a sermon is a wonderful thing. But what I have noticed in my own life is that I tend to ignore my shortcomings. It is convenient for me to overlook things in my life that need to be addressed. I don’t know that I don’t know what I don’t know. In the church, we will have the opportunity to meet those who may be much farther along in their walk with the Lord, and there will be things we can learn from them, simply by rubbing shoulders with them in the context of the church relationship.
A healthy church is a place filled with a family like atmosphere. Yes, there are moments of friction and disagreement, but those are fleeting and give way to laughter and joy and belonging. I grew up in a healthy family environment. I know first hand what that looks like. And I assure you, there is nothing quite like it. Being a part of a church gives us the opportunity to experience that joy. I had a friend in grade school who had spent his early years in an orphanage in Korea. He and his sister were adopted into a loving family that lived across the street from me when I was young. Do not ever underestimate the value of a family relationship. He clung to the concept of family. He had seen both sides, and much preferred a mother and a father and a family. We need each other. We spur each other on to maturity. And we actually are family—we are all God’s children.
Nothing that we can do can possibly impress God, and cause Him to say that we have earned our spot in Heaven. Our very best is nothing to an infinite God. Our access to Heaven is based solely on the person of Jesus and what He did for us when He went to the cross and paid the price for our sins. However, God does expect us to show our faith through good works. The good we do should be a natural outgrowth of a close walk with Him. It should never be seen as a requirement for admission into eternal home. We love others because He first loved us. It is as simple as that.
Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.
The Lesson
Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to thank you for coming to my news conference today. It is indeed an honor to stand before you today and introduce to the world, my newest invention. I have with me a prototype of what I believe may be the most incredible machine ever built. I call it “The Turbo Encabulator”.
For many years now, I have been working to bring to perfection the crudely conceived idea of a machine that would function as an inverse reactive protoboloid.
Such a machine is the Turbo-Encabulator.
Throughout development, I felt that it should automatically synchronize unitary phase components. This was realized with the medial use of capacitive directance.
The basic premise focuses on the fact that magneto flux issues must be controlled by sublunary conductors.
As you can see, the base plate is made of prefabulated amulite and surmounted by a logarithmic casing. This insures that the double spur magnetrons are in perfect alignment with the malleable flux line. The main windamere is of the normal Lotus-O-Delta type, which has effectively eliminated side cropping of the waneshaft.
You will notice 6 hydro-coptic marzelvanes attached to stator slots, each with a nonreversible tremie pipe connecting them to a differential girdlespring which is held in the “up” position by nofer trunnions.
Grouting brushes monitor the slip-stream remnants and inject a high S-value rotor resin as necessary. This process is equalized by an ingenious hopper dadoscope confirmated in each slot.
Electrical engineers will appreciate the difficulty in nubing together a regurging purwell and a standard wennelsprock. Indeed, this proved to be a stumbling block until I discovered in 2008 that the use of anhydrous nangling pins anabled the boiling shim to be tankered with very little effort.
Spiral decommutation was a second significant hurdle. The gremlin studs created insufficient gram protection. When I discovered that with the simple addition of a nivel-sheave, the wending problem was completed displaced, and perfect running was secured.
Operating points are maintained as close as possible to the normal h.f.rem peak of 12,000 pti, and once the phase detractors have been remised, no dramcock oil is required. Sinusoidal depleneration is then controlled by the reciprocating dingle arm.
Undoubtedly, the Turbo-Encabulator is the most advanced on the market today.
I would like to demonstrate this magnificent piece of engineering for you. I will plug this into normal 120 volt electrical current, and when I press the “On” button, the machine will almost instantaneously reach its equilibrium point and from that point on it will run essentially vibration free and with absolutely no sound at all. There…no perceivable vibration and completely noise free.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, The Turbo Encabulator. Thank you very much.
I will now take a few questions from the press.
What does it do? Well, no one has ever asked me that question before. Are you sure that is the question you wanted to ask? Ok, I…I am looking back through my notes here, you’ll have to excuse me just a moment…I’m pretty sure…no, that ‘s not it…hydrocoptic marzelvanes…spiral decommutation…h.f.rem peak…no…I’m afraid I have some bad news to report to you. I’m a bit embarrassed to admit this, but I believe that I have invented a machine that does absolutely nothing. Nothing at all. But at least it looks impressive doing nothing, doesn’t it?
There are a number of reasons that we should attend and be a part of a local church. First and foremost, God said so. That stands alone as reason enough. End of discussion. Let’s get in the car and go home.
If you need more than that, you may have a spiritual problem that needs to be addressed. But there are advantages for the Christian who does attend church and does not just sit as a spectator, but gets involved. The key here is involvement. At the moment of our conversion, God gives each of us a spiritual gift. That gift is given with a goal in mind. We are to use that gift in the church, in cooperation with other people who also have their individual gifts, and work together to accomplish great things for God. He uses the picture in the New Testament of a human body. Many parts working together to move and breath and live. The church likewise is many parts, each unique, but necessary for proper function.
Consider the concept of playing baseball. It’s difficult to swing a bat with only one arm. With only one eye, depth perception fails and it becomes impossible to judge the distance and speed of the pitch. Only one leg makes the running of the bases a huge challenge. We need all of our parts to play a good game. The church needs all of her parts as well, and God has strategically placed people in the church for specific purposes. We need to learn what our specific gift is, develop it, and then use it for His kingdom.
The local church fills other needs in our lives as well. We were created as social beings. We need relationships to function well. Sitting in a fishing boat on Sunday morning and watching the sunrise may make us feel close to God for a moment, but there is little to no social interaction there, and whether we want to admit it or not, God created us with a need that only the presence of other people can fill in our lives. We have all seen, or at least heard, of examples of the odd behaviors established by those who completely withdraw from society and social interaction. I recall, as a young man, hearing and reading about the richest man in the world at the time, Howard Hughes. A man with everything at his fingertips, and an amazing intellect, withdrew from everyone and lived as a very wealthy recluse. And died a very miserable, lonely man. He finished his life poorly. We need others—Christian others—who can challenge us and correct us if necessary.
We need a reminder from time to time who God is and our place in His plan. The world we live in is going to try to get our attention away from things spiritual and fill that void with anything that it can. We can easily get caught up in the lights and glitter of the excitement of the world. Satan is the greatest showman who ever lived and can quite easily distract us from what is really important in life. We need to focus on God and what He has to offer. When our children were young, we enrolled them in team sports in the community. Specifically, soccer. Our oldest, our son, played from the time he was 4 or 5 years old through high school. If you have ever been around a community league team, as the age bracket rises, so does the possibility of having to travel to neighboring towns to play games. When he started playing years ago, it was unthinkable for a league team to play a game on a Sunday afternoon. But very gradually, something changed. First, it was a “make-up game” that was scheduled “just once” on a Sunday afternoon. A year or two later, a game or two was scheduled for a Sunday afternoon. I vividly remember the weekend we found ourselves at a tournament that scheduled the final game for the top two teams for Sunday morning at 11:00. Our son chose to not play in that game and risked losing his place on the team, rather than compromise his convictions. Today, I teach a 6th-7th grade Sunday School class, and it is not uncommon during the sports seasons, to have half of the class out due to scheduled tournament games. God has described Himself as a still, small voice, a whisper. In the noise of today, that whisper is sometimes difficult to hear. Church gives us an organized, purposed time to reflect on God and his goodness. We need that structure.
Growth for the Christian occurs in many ways. Daily devotions are a wonderful thing. Listening to a sermon is a wonderful thing. But what I have noticed in my own life is that I tend to ignore my shortcomings. It is convenient for me to overlook things in my life that need to be addressed. I don’t know that I don’t know what I don’t know. In the church, we will have the opportunity to meet those who may be much farther along in their walk with the Lord, and there will be things we can learn from them, simply by rubbing shoulders with them in the context of the church relationship.
A healthy church is a place filled with a family like atmosphere. Yes, there are moments of friction and disagreement, but those are fleeting and give way to laughter and joy and belonging. I grew up in a healthy family environment. I know first hand what that looks like. And I assure you, there is nothing quite like it. Being a part of a church gives us the opportunity to experience that joy. I had a friend in grade school who had spent his early years in an orphanage in Korea. He and his sister were adopted into a loving family that lived across the street from me when I was young. Do not ever underestimate the value of a family relationship. He clung to the concept of family. He had seen both sides, and much preferred a mother and a father and a family. We need each other. We spur each other on to maturity. And we actually are family—we are all God’s children.
Nothing that we can do can possibly impress God, and cause Him to say that we have earned our spot in Heaven. Our very best is nothing to an infinite God. Our access to Heaven is based solely on the person of Jesus and what He did for us when He went to the cross and paid the price for our sins. However, God does expect us to show our faith through good works. The good we do should be a natural outgrowth of a close walk with Him. It should never be seen as a requirement for admission into eternal home. We love others because He first loved us. It is as simple as that.
Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.